How to Develop BRAVERY (pt.1): The “Brave-Heart Journaling” Technique…
Here’s part 1 of a trilogy on CULTIVATING COURAGE – both in your daily life and on a deeper level. It describes a technique I created that I’ve been using for about a week now (love being my own guinea pig), and you’re going to enjoy it…
By the way, this week’s blog talk radio show is called The Issue & Status of Manhood in this Day & Age (A Solution-Oriented Discussion). I’m looking to get your feedback and dialogue on this one, so get the details you need here.
—— Brave-Heart Journaling Explained ——
This technique operates in three phases:
ONE: The first thing you do is get a small, pocket-sized notepad (something you can carry around), and make a tally every time you let yourself lose an opportunity to be brave, like:
>> Not speaking up for yourself (or not saying something for fear of how they’ll react).
>> Not sticking with something long enough…giving up when you almost KNOW that a little bit of persistence would of got you what you wanted, or
>> For men, not approaching a woman you find attractive,
…so on and so forth. Basically, bypassing any opportunity you have to grow through exhibiting courage. Intuitively, you know what these are IN THE MOMENT.
TWO: After you mark a tally down, note the lesson to be extracted from it. You might need to think about it for a second, but remember that life is always throwing “jewels” your way to help you expand, so at some level you already know the attributes you need to develop.
>> Persistence: not backing out because you perceive an objection or challenge,
>> Action: being present-minded enough to go with your gut (rather then LIVING in your own brain), and
>> Independence: freeing yourself from the need for approval, and not acting like you can telepathically understand how others are judging you.
THREE: So with these, at the end of a day, look for a common theme and then make that tomorrow’s focus.
Look at each lesson as an element of growing more brave, authentic and strong, and then approach each day with that elemental-focus AS WELL AS an awareness for other weaknesses.
There’s many ways to focus on the element, but I suggest something along the lines of what’s called “Mantram Repitition.” I put a video up on the resource page for reducing stress, so here it is again:
In essence, you embody the element by creating an affirmation about it, and then training your attention around that affirmation throughout the day.
If the lesson was assertiveness, the affirmation might be “I am assertiveness,” or “Assertiveness and I are one,” and you’d repeat it silently in yourself at every opportunity you have (when standing in line, going for a walk, stuck in traffic, etc., etc.)
In this way, you not only train your attention (keeping you in a relaxed, powerful state) but you also CONDITION YOUR SUBCONSCIOUS MIND along the path of growth you need to develop courage.
I’ve been on this for a week now, and I find myself AUTOMATICALLY acting on the lessons because my unconscious mind is constantly getting the instructions that it needs.
At the same time, I’m constantly becoming more and more conscious of my own weak points because I’m constantly on the lookout for them and using my life experience as a feedback tool.
With the Brave-Heart Journal, your doing three things in a cycled sequence: observing, decoding, and then conditioning (repeatedly).
It’s a lot like when football players watch video of themselves on the field: At first their like, “whoa…I have like FIFTY things I need to work on” and it humbles them. Before they swore they were all that, but the footage – in your case the journal – pinpoints the truth, so then they can be more scientific (methodical) about their performance.
Here’s those steps again:
1) Observe: tally your lost opportunities to exhibit bravery,
2) Decode: look for the pattern, theme or main element each day, and
3) Condition: train your attention on an affirmation that helps you embody that element the day after (see the Mantram Repetition video above).
Go out and try this, enjoy yourself and be sure to check the blog out tomorrow for part 2 of "How to Develop Bravery…”