That’s the title for a mini-documentary I’m putting together, and I’m blogging about it now because I couldn’t wait to share some of the research with you. Listen to this:

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

“- the drug-dealer,
- the gang member,
- the ducking-&-diving political leader,
- the wife-beater,
- the chronically crabby boss,
- the hotshot junior executive,
- the unfaithful husband,
- the company yes-man,
- the indifferent graduate school advisor,
- the holier-than-thou minister,
- the father who can never find the time to attend his daughter’s school programs,
- the coach who ridicules his star athletes,
- the therapist who unconsciously attacks his client’s shining and seeks a kind of gray normalcy for them,
- the yuppy…

All of these men have something in common: THEY’RE ALL BOYS PRETENDING TO BE MEN.

They got that way honestly because nobody showed them what a mature man is like…their kind of manhood is a pretense to manhood that goes largely undetected by most of us.

We’re continually mistaking his controlling, threatening and hostile behaviors for strength, when in reality, he’s showing an extreme vulnerability and weakness: the vulnerability of the wounded boy.”

“The devastating fact is that most men are FIXATED at an immature level of development…a level governed by mental-blueprints appropriate to boyhood.

When they’re allowed to rule what should be adulthood, when the archetypes of boyhood aren’t built upon and transcended by the ego’s healthy assessment of the archetypes of mature masculinity, they cause us to act out of our hidden to us (but seldom to others) boyishness…”

“The boy must die…that’s the critical theme here. The boy must die in order for the man to live.

(Just as) the butterfly can’t shrivel up and go, ‘ugh, this sucks..I want to be a caterpillar again,’ IT’S A TOTAL TRANSFORMATION, not a partial one. There’s no going back…” ~ Eben Pagan

The upcoming documentary will be a video series (maybe 30 minutes or so) of combined field research and my personal study (I’m doing A LOT of interviews). Sign up to the listserve to stay updated.

To be clear, I’m not doing any of this to put myself out there as some type of know-it-all (ask anyone who knows me). I’m doing this to raise attention on the subject so that we can start generating solutions as a community, because it’s a serious problem. Leave a comment below to let me know what you think.

Also, I just created a facebook fanpage for the blog:this will help the site gain visibility, make it easier to communicate with everyone AND build a community around the constructive things we talk about here.

I need your help though: the thing is, unless there’s a significant amount of activity on the fanpage, facebook will give me a poor ranking, making it more difficult for people to find out about this blog. Please take a second to “like” the fanpage and comment on/like some of the photos, posts or statuses I have up already. Here’s the link: http://www.facebook.com/todays.transcendence

You’ll also see a “like” button at the end of each post now, and if you look in the right sidebar (under all the facebook stuff), a skype address and phone number to reach me on directly…

Thanks for checking this out.

Peace,
+B