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Your Desire to Grow is a SACRED GIFT: Key Ideas for Keeping Self-Development Simple and Satisfying…

30 June 2011 No Comment

african american woman with gift

When I was in grade school, there was this gifted child program called “More Able Learners” (MAL), and I loved it.



It was an accelerated learning course for kids deemed to be “advanced” (I think all kids are advanced, but whatever) where we all came together to learn advanced stuff:



>> stock market basics and simulation,

>> brain teasers and riddles,

>> computer programs and even

>> the subtle psychological ploys of modern-day advertising.






I’m saying this because I think of my blog (and personal growth as a whole) in a similar way…I look at anyone trying to develop themselves, anyone trying conscientiously to raise their thinking to the next level in order to bring about changes in their life, as a special type of person who needs to be honored.



What I want you do to is HONOR that in yourself: treat your desire to grow as a sacred gift that needs a special type of attention in order to flourish and grow.



So here’s a few true but not-so obvious, intuitive but not-so-easy-to-remember key ideas to keep with you…




Key Idea #1: Can’t Stop, Won’t Stop

african american male confusedI’ve been serious about becoming a better person for at least 9 years now, and STILL have issues…I mean maaaaaad issues.



I wrote a pretty dope article on dating advice a while back, but I’m still learning TON about women to this day.



I wrote another piece on self-deception that got 500+ likes the other day, and still catch myself playing games now, and I’m pretty well-known for the video series I did on health and nutrition, but I’m still trying to get my act together in those regards too.



It’s funny: I think people see the work I do online (how consistent I am with it and everything) and assume that I’m some super-developed, on-point guy, but the reality is I’m just another cat trying to figure things out like everybody else.



I’m really just sharing the things I learn about myself as I learn and overcome them. The only reason why I’m able to churn out so much material is cause I’m always figuring things out about myself…it’s really more of a de-personalized journal.



But what I’m getting at here is that the journey is eternal: you’ll never hit a point where you feel like you’ve “made it,” so learn to enjoy the process more so then the actual results.



You have to look at this whole self-development thing like a video game: when you reach the end of a level, you have fight a difficult boss, and even when you beat that boss, you move on to another, MORE difficult level with an even more difficult boss after that…





The skills you learned on one stage are what you use to leverage yourself in order to conquer the next, and the challenge is what makes it fun (if you don’t take the game seriously).



Similarly, the better you get at:

>> keeping yourself motivated and managing your time,

>> taking care of body and eating healthy,

>> Your emotional well-being and why you feel the way you do,



…or anything else cool and interesting that helps you in life, the deeper this rabbit hole goes. You don’t really notice the growth until you look back over the long term and say, “Damn…I’ve come a long way.”




Don’t Get Discouraged

So don’t get discouraged. I remember talking to this girl one day and she said:



“I don’t see the point. No matter how much you try to improve yourself, you’re always going to find something about yourself that you don’t like, so you’ll always feel inadequate, so why even bother???”



Don’t think like that. Don’t feel down because you’re not where you want to be, because even when you get there your going to want to be somewhere ELSE again (it’s human nature to seek to improve).



Instead, look back and think about where you WOULD be if you never started to introspect, read, reflect, learn, try new routines and open your mind to new ways of living in the first place.



pull your damn pants up!Me??? I’d be like another one of these young cats walking around with their pants sagging off their behind with no grooming, no manners and no ambition.



(I’m serious…that was me at one point in time, so don’t underestimate any of the young brothers you see out there. You never know what they might go through or where they might be in 5-10 years.)



So again, when it comes to personal growth, think “can’t stop, won’t stop.” The journey is eternal, and you have to constantly re-ground your thinking in an evolutionary perspective, not so much ends-and-results.




Key Idea #2: Roll Dolo from State to State

There’s this scene in the movie Belly where Method Man’s character is in Nebraska, and when the drug lords ask him why he’s by himself he says:



“I roll dolo from state to state!!! Word up…”


method man



…laughing with a big smile on his face, completely comfortable as if there’s nothing awkward about the idea.



So whereas he meant he moved from state to state physically, when it comes to personal growth, you’re moving from state to state mentally, and you’re doing it BY YOURSELF. (That’s why it’s called “personal” growth…deep, right?)






The path of developing as a person is essentially an introverted process: it’s an introvert’s game that requires skill and comfort in an introvert’s way of life.



If you think about it, whenever someone goes to a counselor, a spiritual guru, a psychiatrist or whatever, what do they encourage them to do? Right! They tell them to be more introverted.



They ask them questions about WHY they did what they did and what certain events in their past MEAN to them. They tell them to do things like journal, pray, meditate, etc. etc. I remember reading something somewhere and it was like…”



…more tomorrow. Check back in and we’ll continue right where we left off.


asian woman using laptop



Peace,
+B



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